When I decided to compete I actually didn’t fully grasp what I was getting myself in to. Thankfully, I am a research driven decision-maker so, at least I made some in-depth and well thought out decisions about my choice of coach.
Naturally, I love health and fitness so I thought it would fit into a lifestyle that I was already living but take me that step further, increasing my knowledge of training by training with a purpose. It did fulfill these goals – I learned great methods of exercise and how to build muscle and now can walk into a gym and plan my own workout.
Underneath all of this it was superficial though – I wanted to look good by gaining muscle and losing body fat. Both for the sake of other people and also because I thought if I looked good I would be more confident and comfortable in my own skin. The way I saw it back then was that it was win-win situation.
However, when I completed my first ever comp (coming second place overall in Brisbane) I left that day saying “I’m never doing that again” – it was hard and I wasn’t happy even though I thought I had achieved the very thing that would make me happy.
A year and a half later, I found myself in the same situation although this time my motive was a combination of wanting to come first place in Brisbane & get back the temporary body that I had now lost post-comp. Alas, I left comp again unsatisfied, exhausted and with a social-deficit.
Today, a month later, I can say that yes I have put on a little more body fat and all my curves have come back…. but I realised last night that my body is actually just curvy – it was made like that and I should just accept that. I haven’t given up training (and I won’t) but I am happier as my life is now more balanced.
Happiness comes from many things and those are your passions, your friends and family, your spirituality, rest and enjoying every day of your life. Don’t live your life restricted from all the things you love. If you do want to do comp check yourself first and ensure your motivation is one of true competitiveness and not selfishness as you won’t be fulfilled out of just that.